Who We Were

I’m proud of you because you used to cry so much and you still do

You dance in the pieces of glass when they shatter on the floor 

One time I walked into the room and you were tying paper wings to your back and I swear that I saw you in the sky that night

You told me that the chains of people’s expectations always left marks on your ankles and when I saw you without them one day I wasn’t surprised

The day that I asked you for advice you said I already had everything that I needed

And that every place I didn’t see beauty to look again

So I looked and saw the ocean

Escape

You throw stones at yourself while you point your finger at something else

But it’s you that’s throwing them baby

And I know that because the same rocks that you’re throwing at you were the rocks that I was throwing at me

But they hurt too bad so I stopped and anybody who looks can see the scars if they look long enough

Honesty is so scary

Being scared is part of being free

But we would rather walk around in somebody else’s shoes than look in the mirror

whenever you get the chance…

This is a new day where we will find all of the old things that we didn’t put to rest

Our souls, active with a melody bitter-sweet, fly in spirals around all of the things that could have been

There’s a picture of me and you in a place that never existed, oh how my mind likes to tell stories

Can you tell me a story?

About me and you

Where we can slay a dragon and make it to the end together

The difference between stories and real life is that in real life we are the dragons

And in real life we’ll never see the end until we’re there

They say you should never regret something that you once wanted, but are you allowed to want something that they told you you’d forever regret

Remember me

Remember me at 3 a.m. when the shadows play with the way my name sounds on their lips

Remember me when the person you try to hide gets loud again

Remember me when all of the other faces around you start to look the same

I’ll remember you

I’ll remember you when my heart is caught at another dead end

I’ll remember you when I’m a ghost trying to find something that makes me feel as alive as you did

I’ll remember you when I can’t remember anything else

Until we meet again…

I thought I’d never see the day.

You age so well

Such a beautiful mess

Do you remember the last time you let your hair loose and drifted into the wind

Now is never your forever

Fearing the transience is like not wanting to get up in the morning

It happens so often when will we learn that another day always follows until there are no more left

Let us sing

It takes a long time to love the song in yourself

But if you don’t find that peace will you ever love the song in someone else

I just wanted to say that I’m sorry for all the times I was somewhere else when I should have been right there with you

We never want to be anywhere we are until we can’t be there anymore

Thank you for the times when you almost ran out of breath and still found a way to split them in half with me

If you don’t forgive the ones you love you’ll have nothing left and that is how you die

Distress.

I yearn for all those things that’ll never happen again

Am I afraid?

I cheer myself on because when I didn’t I almost lost…so then I started and now I’m not as far behind

New dreams hatch in my life and I try to make room for them

But can I bear to put my efforts into something that lasts when my heart wants me to go somewhere else

It was a long time ago when I gave up on pretending

That’ll never be the way that I go

People say I’m different but I try to explain that I’m just unlocked

I lived blinded until I learned that seeing wasn’t all that bad only sometimes

I’m used to it all now

And I’d take a solemn truth over a pretty lie any day

Ghost.

I hope that when you’re sitting there reflecting on the influx of people throughout your days, you don’t feel the overwhelming chasm that separates your thoughts from theirs

That one hurts the most

Having a conversation with someone and feeling like you are in different galaxies

Feeling like your words are foreign

Looking into the eyes of faces realizing how rare it is to establish a connection

Frantically wandering around with all of your soul unlocked and not knowing what to do with it

You have to put it somewhere, that’s what I learned

It’s too heavy to carry in your hands alone

We weren’t meant for that, I’ve grown to believe

Maybe you’ll avoid the mediocrity of normalcy by realizing that the person you hide never really dies

I felt all of those things at once

I never stop feeling them

I’m in a room of ghosts looking through pictures of yesterday

I tricked myself into remembering the best parts the most and burying the bad ones deep in the ground

Until I realized the bad ones are important too

Now I’m sitting here with all of the pages open

Sometimes things are grim but a lot of times they are just honest

There is such a severity in honest

But a lot of times I’m wrong too so I’m sorry for trying to sound right

Let go hold on let go hold on.

Don’t you think there’s a reason why we’re the only ones who can’t see our own face

The horror story is our mind

But we can’t see it fully

Only a piece

Our biggest real fear is the truth

Nobody wants to hear it so we run away

I’m running you’re running we are all running

We try to save others but we can’t even save ourselves

We need love like we need air

I heard somebody say that security is a superstition..it’s not real

I don’t know whether it’s worse to hold onto something or let it go

This one is for you.

There are people that you would die for

Cross the bridge of your differences for

Take endless risks for

That is a gift called love given to help illuminate your path

I love you

Always have always will

Love doesn’t dissappear

It doesn’t fade

Love lasts and it prevails

Love can be a solitary force but it can also be a conjoined effort

I’ve seen both

You are the best parts of me that I’ll never forget

And when it comes time for us to name our regrets you’ll be nowhere near my list

There are people you’d cross the ocean for

That’s who you are to me

Bits of nostalgia.

Having lived in this world it becomes impossible to deny at some point encountering an “I love you” that was actually a goodbye

We have all tasted the kisses that whisper “I’m sorry”

Or the hugs that couldn’t last long enough

An open heart isn’t always easy to keep especially when there are threats and memories written all over it

We bleed, we cry, we lose, we suffer, we mourn, we break, we fail, we are failed

But we’re still here

And we must learn to love again

Almost is never enough.

We find ourselves in different people & places

Sometimes in a song or a feeling

In kisses and in tears

In memories and lessons

Hardships and blessings

Pieces are scattered in all places

Finding them is like finding a pair of earrings that we thought were gone for good

Everything that we find, we’ve had all along and that’s what makes finding it so important

♡